Today I realized how much I love gooseberries. I miss them too. They remind me of my childhood.
You won’t like them if you like sweet fruits. My children surely don’t….they even expect sweet oranges every time. The sour ones get a yucky face thrown at them.
Tell me do you remember always having sweet oranges? I don’t … yet blame it on (my) bad parenting. My kids expect them to be sweet all the time. That’s the reason they don’t like gooseberries. Gooseberries are sweet some times but most times they are sour and slightly bitter with a sweet aftertaste. They taste like life.
No one ever promised that life would be sweet and always to your taste but seems that’s what we end up teaching our kids now or maybe they learn it from watching us.
Kids who jump off buildings when they are shouted at in front of the whole class, kids who kill themselves if they fail an exam, kids who prefer death to the ignominy of being singled out for punishment. I remember my dad laughing about the caning he got as a child from his teachers, he looked back with little resentment and a lot of pride at proving the teachers wrong when he achieved degrees higher than them.
Is it the fruits we feed our kids…sweet apples though out the year, sweeter grapes and sweet mangoes? Or does it go deeper than that? Do we tell them that it’s fine to fail? Do we tell them our failures with pride and show them what we learnt from them? Do we even allow them to fail?
Hug them, talk to them when they cry. Say it’s ok to fail.Say you don’t think any less of them because they failed; that tomorrow is another day and …coz you and everyone before you failed too..many times.
Show them your hurts and wounds so that they learn that wounds heal, hurts seem to wane… with time. Everything goes with time.
So that they don’t leave before time.